Some pastors are super cool – play the drums, wear the latest trends, drive a sleek car. Some pastors are physically conditioned beasts – biceps like guns, bench press a small car, every shirt is form fitted to show the pecs. Some pastors are over the top handsome – GQ material, pearly white teeth that shine, eyes that sparkle, and always ready for the camera.
But our church has a whole new category. He (and by he, I mean me) is weird. We could talk about his clothes, a quirky and eclectic collection, or his lack of any real talent (no musical or any tangible skills), or his sense of humor that gets lost in his presentation. Don’t even get me started on his physique, which is more a cover for Mad Magazine then GQ. What we will talk about is barf. Yes, you read that right, barf.
Last night at the kids program, he shined in his weirdness. He helped just briefly in the craft rotation. He put four 3rd grade boys together at one craft table. The leaders threatened him for such an act – and told the preacher he would have to stay and keep monitor over those four rowdy, squirmy, attention grabbing lads. They were making small wind chimes and coloring the train that was emphasizing how they were kept on track by Jesus.
He said they should put a person in the window, or a dog, anything. One drew the pastor. And when the pastor asked the lad what the pastor was doing on the train, he said “barfing.” So for the next 5 minutes, barf was colored everywhere. Green markers busy at work. Barf sounds coming from kids and preacher alike. They colored and laughed and had fun.
And one little boy gave the pastor a special drawn picture for his office … the official version of “The Pastor’s Barf Train” in all its splendor. This will be hung with pride.
The adult group and craft leaders (all women) looked on with those looks that scare most men. Heads were shaken. Eyes were rolled. And all acknowledged … our pastor is weird.
We hope the boys learned the Bible lesson. We pray the songs of God’s strength are remembered and they really know He loves them. But we, well me, the pastor who’s been writing about myself in the 3rd person … I hope these boys make a connection with me, know they can talk with me, realize I am normal albeit weird – not just a boring preacher. And if I can show the love of Christ, connecting with them by talking and coloring barf, then let green crayons run wild.
So I’m weird and I’m proud of it.