Are you one of those who has to get in the last word? Maybe you do it subconsciously, but you still do it. Or, maybe you really get annoyed at people who try to get the last word in. You know the type … maybe you’re even in a relationship with one and it drives.you.crazy. (It probably drives you crazy because you want the last word and they keep stealing your thunder, just saying.)
There are several reasons people try for that one last statement …
- They don’t feel they are being heard. They think being right, being the winner is more important than being understood. So if they are not getting their way, they think they must continue to argue (even if it is a losing argument … all or nothing type of communication.) This is often a power struggle and they want control, they want dominance.
- They have trouble listening and giving validation to other people. It may be poor social skills or just arrogance of their own way of thinking.
- It could be self esteem issues, an attempt to feel better about themselves. A narcissistic characteristic. Not that they’re a narcissist, just portraying a quality of being one. Basically, a compensation for insecurity.
- They think the world circles around them. It’s kind of egocentric and a demand for attention.
- And it could also be simply out of anger. Demands for the final word, or simply shouting, is an expression of their angry feelings.
So to respond … stay poised, step away for a break if necessary, and if it’s contentious, just don’t engage. Silence speaks volumes at times.
This is not really about all that. I just wanted to share a last word from MuddyShoes for 2020 and the discussion on last words just came out of my finger tips.
Tomorrow is 2021. And just after midnight, we can all say we have 2020 hindsight. (Go ahead, reread that, it was an attempt at humor and it might take two readings.)
My Final Word for 2020 … LOVE!
Three things on love …
- God loves you. (I hope you know that.)
- We are called to love God with everything we are, everything we have, everything we do.
- We should love others as ourselves.
And that my dear readers is my final word for 2020. May 2021 be full great things for each and every one of you … full of love for God and knowing the love of God.