Why Does Anyone Listen To Me?

Why do you read the blogs you do, or listen to the podcast you do? Do you know the person? Have a similar interest? Desire to grow? What is it?

Maybe you are communicator yourself? A speaker, writer, influencer, YouTuber, teacher, preacher? Maybe you are parent that feels your communications with your kids are falling flat and ineffective? Maybe it’s just emails you send to co-workers. We all communicate. And in today’s volatile world where people don’t really listen to each other, communication that connects is more vital than ever.

There are many books and articles and such out there about creating better messages that ‘stick’. It’s been a while, but I read Alan Nelson’s Creating Messages That Connect : 10 Secrets of Effective Communicators. This 20 year old work is one that helps communicators hone their skill. Hone their skill, that is critical for all of us who communicate. And we should always be sharpening our ax, keeping our skills fresh. As Nelson said in his bio on Amazon, the idea is to train leaders “while they are moldable, not moldy.”

The ten secrets …

• Secret # 1 : answer the question “why should I listen to you?”
• Secret # 2 : know your audience
• Secret # 3 : clarify the context
• Secret # 4 : strategize the four primary message-design components
• Secret # 5 : give them handles
• Secret # 6 : bait the hook
• Secret # 7 : avoid the bore-snore factor
• Secret # 8 : ask for the sale
• Secret # 9 : measure results
• Secret # 10 : bridge for broader impact

In recent additions, he adds ‘market well’ and ‘write to convince’ (or speak, or whatever.)

Think of this … “why should you listen to me?’ is the start of issue. We need to have a reason that the listeners are invested. Show our investment. Prove our value. Maybe this is positional (a parson to this flock), or our expertise, or our interest in a topic (a commentator on a current issue), or whatever. I would hope you are reading this because you find my wisdom intriguing, my humor exhilarating, and skills not to shabby. Maybe your related to me (my mother was one of four people who read my graduate Thesis.)

I read writers and listen to those who know the trails I want to hike, share the practical application of the scripture I am studying, or are knowledgeable in topics interesting to me.

Clarify the Context … how much time is wasted on comparing apples to oranges. Words that mean different things to different people need to be clarified.

Give them handles … something that they can grab and take with them. Grabbing a hot cup of coffee is better with handles. Less spills – more efficient. This is personal illustrations, questions that connect, notable quotables, etc.

Avoid the bore-snore factor. This hits me pretty tough when I see someone nodding off. Ouch. So I use humor, illustrations, craziness. I move around, I change my tone and tempo. Maybe I overdo, but I try.

Maybe ten steps is too many. I borrowed this down to three steps …

HOOK – LOOK – TOOK

HOOK – get them interested, set the stage
LOOK – discuss the issue, dig into the topic, lay it out well
TOOK – give them something to take with them, the goal is change … so give them ways to use the knowledge, the article, the speech in their everyday life

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This article is basically a book review, but it is vital for all of us in our effort for communicating that connects.

Look through the ten secrets by Dr. Nelson. Which one do you and you need to work on? Well, work on it.